Man, I am tired today! I took 3 days off now from the gym to kind of reset my mind, and to get some work done as things have been pretty busy with clients etc over the last few weeks. I’m a workaholic, and I often have to remind myself to SLOW DOWN. Take time off, work within scheduled hours, don’t make myself available 24/7. It’s a hard balance when you love what you do, and I have a hard time saying “no” sometimes. But I never bite off more than I can chew, so when I feel it’s time to regather and regroup, I take a step back to do so.Lately, I’ve been feeling a huge metamorphosis coming on for me on so many levels. I turned 34 back in August, and I remember having this kind of mental shift at 21, then 25, now again a new wave is here. It’s like I have a wiser sense about things and I’m totally cognizant of this awakening sort of thing I feel in my brain. It’s weird to describe, but if you’ve been through it, you know what I mean. I got rid of some people in my life that I felt energy wise held me back, I had a break-up of a close relationship that really rocked me. It happened over the summer, right before Gulf States. It took EVERYTHING in me not to fall apart, even though I was devastated. And it was like the week before I had to peak, so there was no time for emotions and drama that would just fuck everything up. I stopped talking to that person for a while, even though I had to seem them EVERY DAY almost. They even chased after me to talk to me but I scurried along, avoiding eye contact and pretending my music was too loud to hear. Eventually we started speaking again, and although the relationship isnt the same, I still sort of miss this person, and I am at the same time allowing myself to just move on. So part of this new thing has to do with that, and just seeing the world and people differently. And me maturing and wanting more from life and myself.

So with that out of the way, the next thing that I have been wanting (which I just identified the other day) is a NEW ENVIRONMENT. So I’m moving. I moved into this apartment when I first arrived in LA from NYC. It’s really nice, but it’s served its purpose and I think I’d like something a little bigger, WITHOUT CARPET, freakin hate carpet. I’m not in a rush, I want to find the perfect place, but yeah, that’s a task in and of itself. I know what I want, and I’ll know it when I see it.

And lastly, I’m really excited about this shoot that I have coming up with the guys at LHGFX. It’s at the end of this month, so plenty of time to drop the cookies and get my azz into some kind of photo ready shape, lol. I was supposed to shoot with them in Vegas at the O, but it was way too last minute in trying to get stuff together. So I’m looking forward to getting in some great shots with them now that I can plan a little better for it.

I need a nap! I was up until like 2 or 3 am today, and I’m starting to feel that!

 

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