The last couple of days I feel like I’ve been seriously bullshitting my efforts.
I need to work harder.
I need to train smarter.
I need to stay on plan.
I don’t know, sometimes I feel like I’m over the hype, the nubile hype of getting on stage.
Now when I step on stage, there are stakes.
And that can be a good or bad thing.
Stakes means pressure.
Pressure by oneself, pressure by others, pressure from your own crazy brain.
But I love being on stage.
But sometimes the road to it can be somewhat…
I’m not quite sure why I keep typing, and then hitting return to make a new sentence. It’s kinda for that dramatic effect.
So. I’ve decided.
13 weeks out and now it’s game on.
No more fuckin around.
Hell my suits will be in my hand by next week. And since that, and the fact that I just got my NPC card in the mail. And I already have my plane ticket to Seattle for the Emerald Cup. And that I’ve already comitted to the Grand Prix….
My ass will be on stage.
So I have no choice but to be my best.
So now it’s time to drop the bullshit and drop in.
In other news. I totally need a boyfriend. Being single ain’t so cool anymore.
Romeo where are you?