The PEAK has officially begun.

I’m keeping the body under wraps.

All I’ve got to say is, fuck a bunch of judging, I’m about to present a total package that I’ve never had on stage before. In MY opinion, it’s as close to a pro level physique than I’ve ever presented. So it’s with THIS look that I can actually get some positive feedback as to what will allow me to take things to the next level. 

Everytime I pass by a mirror I’m just floored. Sometimes I wonder if it’s really MY body that I’m seeing. Is it really MY look that has evolved. It’s really incomprehensible in some ways to me. The fact that I’ve been able to really transform my physique compeletely in one year is still so surreal. 

I was doing some thinking the other day. I think this year for me has been so truly amazing. First off, it’s the first time that I TRULY and REALLY love what I do. It’s the first time that I can say I 100% LIVE fitness. It’s a part of who I am, and what I do. It’s my life, my lifestyle. I feel that I’ve finally found and have EMBRACED fully my purpose on this Earth. And that purpose is to inspire. I’ve actually have known that since I was 5. However I had no idea how I would be doing it. The truth of the matter is that no matter where I place or what goes down on Nov 19, 2011, I have inspired women from around the globe to just dare to dream and keep going no matter what. And that means more to me than words can describe. 

For 12 years, my fitness career had been the background to my performing/dance/acting career. I was good, but I was only about 80% dedicated to it. But now, my fitness career is the only thing I crave to grow in for life, and over a lifetime. For the last 2 years (14 years total of transforming bodies), I finally feel like I’m “home.” 

I’ll admit, it’s hard as all fuck to coach oneself. Honestly, unless you’re super driven, crazy, focused, determined, and have a dual personality disorder, you shouldn’t do it. But because all my screws aren’t really in straight, lol, I can do it just well. The biggest thing that I’ve learned has been those things about competing that can’t be taught in a textbook. Sure you can go get your multiple letters through certs, which I’ve done, and you can study for years, which I’ve done, you can practically apply to youself and others over a number of years, which I’ve done. But to walk the walk, and talk the talk, and truly BE what you’re coaching and teaching others is a whole nother thing. And for me, I feel like this experience has only enhanced what I share with my girls even further. They all inspire me SO much. I’m blessed to have an amazing group of women under my wing and guidance.

Anyways, I’m driveling. 

No matter what happens, I will rejoice in this year. I am so calm it kinda scares me. No jitters, just confidence to step on stage and really celebrate what I’ve got. And that’s all that I can do, and all that matters.

So now, to continue to nail this last week. The work is done. My only goal, tighten up, and smile.

(pardon typos, I feel so good right now, and IDGAF)